Sunday, February 8, 2009

Old Blog - 12.22.2005

Thursday, December 22, 2005 

Just hiccup already geez.
Current mood:  pensive

I haven't felt like I've been able to get a good, normal, deep breath in four or five days. I end up making little gasping sighs. It feels like there is a hiccup high in my chest, at the base of my throat, that can't be released. A small little ball that wants to jump out but can't. I have to consciously tell myself to swallow. When I do, it makes my stomach churn.

Nerves to be addressed, ya think? 

It's a beautiful Oregon wintery day - it looks like God removed all color and then turned on the sprinkler system. This was the weather that made me happiest in Colorado. But here in my not-quite-heated office, with an hour and forty-five minutes left to waste, upcoming holidays for which I am NOT prepared, a relationship that is requiring more maintenance than originally planned, and an impending move across the country, I just end up pouting.

I wish I could snap out of it

Old Blog - 12.09.2005

Friday, December 09, 2005 

Yoni
Current mood:  indescribable 
Category: Religion and Philosophy

It was one night after a performance of The Music Man when my mom greeted me at home with, "We're having a boy!"

I joined her on my parents' bed and looked at the picture of the new "brother" we were to receive next week: an tall, skinny, barely-18-year-old boy named Jonathan Alfonso from Tigre, a town two hours outside of Buenos Aires, Argentina. I had just been telling the girls in the dressing room that I hoped we would get the 23 year-old girl because, I think my exact words were, "What the hell am I supposed to do with an 18 year-old boy?"

And a week later, on my parents' 27th wedding anniversary, Jonathan joined our family. The fact that he pretty much knew only how to say "Nice to meet you", "thank you" and "congratulations" didn't help the shyness or timidity of this sweet boy who had never been outside of Buenos Aires, let alone Argentina or South America. On his first day, a moment of brilliance prompted me to pull out my old children's world atlas and the two of us spent an entire Saturday afternoon using pictures and bastardized versions of each other's languages to communicate about the countries we came from. At one point I apologized to him for my poor Spanish and he grinned and said, "Es mejor que mi ingles!" (It's better than my English!) I loved him right then.

So back to my question... what does a 22 year-old American girl do with an 18 year-old Argentinian boy? I quickly figured this out. She teaches him imperative phrases to know in the U.S. society such as "That sucks", "Chill out", "I am going to pick up chicks", "What's your problem, idiot?", and "It's my shit". She drives him to and from school and makes him tell her about his day. In English. She tries mate` and authentic dulce de leche and cumbia. She learns how to cuss in Spanish. She squeezes into a chair with him at night to listen to the newest music he has illegally downloaded. She drinks hot chocolate with him while he studies. She spends a shady evening at FX because it's unnatural for an Argentinian to go three months without dancing. She shows off her favorite parts of Oregon. She realizes how hard Americans are going to have to work to overcome their tarnished reputation with the rest of the world. She meets somebody special. She spends a lot more time at church.  She gives up trying to teach him to pronounce her name. She gains a brother.

And this is only the stuff I can easily articulate. In three months, I feel like I have gained so much perspective about our world and my teeny-tiny place in it.  I am so embarrassed at how ignorant and unaffected I am about so many humanity issues on this planet. I am moved and touched at how something that seems so seemingly commonplace to us as participation in an exchange program is the biggest opportunity to ever to have come to anyone in Yoni's family or community. I reflect on the "accomplishments" I have made in my life and question if any of them are really significant.

Yoni's conversational skills have progressed far past "congratulations" and "nice to meet you", but I'm not sure that he is the one who has learned the most in this experience. He calls me his teacher because I correct his pronunciation. In my heart I call him my teacher because he has corrected my worldview.

Gracias Yoni, mi maestro, mi amigo, y lo mas importante, mi hermano. Ahora, y en el futuro, siempre seras mi hermano.

He leaves on Monday. 

Old Blog - 12.01.2005

Thursday, December 01, 2005 

The other night during dinner...
Current mood:  amused 
Category: Romance and Relationships

"I met a really great guy for Meredith today." said my father.

What? Did he really just say that? My dad, the guy who refers to all boys I used to date as "Floyd"? The same guy who complained to my mom about my red shorts that say "Boston" because he doesn't want anybody looking at my butt? The same guy who consistently makes some warning comment when I leave for the gym because he is convinced that the guys in the weight room will leer at me?

So as we all are quietly enjoying our linguine and clam sauce, my dad informs us that he has met someone that he believes to be a perfect match for me. My mom and I meet eyes but suppress our initial reaction to laugh because we are both intrigued to know what could have possibly caused my typically oblivious yet protective daddy to suddenly become interested in matchmaking for his 22 year-old daughter who is moving 3,000 miles away in less than two months.

The funniest part was his innocent enthusiasm. He had no idea this was funny. He proceeded to rattle off this guy's "stats" - or, the qualities that he thought gave reason as to why I might be interested in him:

He's 25.
He has his business degree from Pacific University.
He works as a controller for the winery my dad is insuring
He played baseball in college. More specifically, he was a catcher.
He lives near Washington Square. (My dad emphasized this one as a major selling point. Because apparently I only can go out with guys who live within a two-mile radius. Or maybe it would simply open up more options for dates seeing as all those new stores AND The Cheesecake Factory just opened there.)

And the clincher, and this is an exact quote:

"He's a very nice-looking guy. I think you'd think he was attractive."

WHAT??

My dad still can't understand why my mom and I laughed so hard.

Old Blog - 11.24.2005

Thursday, November 24, 2005 

Thanksgiving Thoughts
Current mood:  full 
Category: Life

I'm thankful for this meal that is resting in my belly right now...

for my sister's safe journey across the country to be with us...

for getting to experience Yoni's first Thanksgiving with him, and for the inspiration I get from watching him learn and grow everyday...

for the new people that have come into my life recently that I feel like I have known for so much longer than a few months...

for the financial and emotional support my parents have given me without question during this crazy weird post-graduation transition...

for the living situation I have waiting for me in NY...

for the many health blessings in my family...

for warmth and humor and happy memories

for purple irises and grilled cheese sandwiches and unexpected good weather 

for love without condition and friendship without common languages and romance that doesn't make sense or follow logic

for questions that make me think and statements that leave me speechless and music that moves my heart and embraces that feel like conversations

for honesty, for character, for integrity, for ambition

for curiosity, for innocence, for optimism

for a new year of opportunities to come.

Happy Thanksgiving you guys. :)

Old Blog - 11.03.2005

Thursday, November 03, 2005 

I'm moving!!!
Current mood:  ecstatic 
Category: Goals, Plans, Hopes

It's frightening how you can click a mouse and change your life. I just purchased my one-way ticket out of Portland and on to a new adventure that includes poverty, ego-bruising, a very small apartment, and lots of public transportation. It also includes random star-sightings, new friends, old friends, and a city that never sleeps. I am flooded with so much energy and emotion right now as I think about how much of everything after January 21st is unknown for me. I had gotten so detached from Portland after going to school in Colorado, but now that I have been home long enough to re-establish a community, I am dealing with the same separation anxiety issues that I had four years ago. Still, though, elation outweighs it all.

My flight leaves Saturday, January 21st, at 8:35 am. No turning back unless I want to pay 100 dollars and, frankly, I'm too cheap.

 

Old Blog - 10.26.2005

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 

Delightful Moments I Enjoy....
Current mood:  content 
Category: Life

Driving over the Broadway Bridge
Helping "mi hermano" with his tarea and watching him understand.
Listening to "Fighter" on my ipod during my last and most intense minutes on the treadmill.
Drinking my stumptown coffee in my sweatpants with nowhere to go
The funny song my phone sings when I get a text message
A glass of red wine with my mom before dinner
Plucking my eyebrows. No seriously. It's this weird OCD thing that I really like doing.
Seeing people trip and fall. I'm not mean - it's just a really funny, honest moment to witness. And it's Schaudenfraude. :)
Talking to the cute boy at church. 
Out-of-the-blue e-mails.
Sneaky naps
45-minute Danny Black warm-ups
Organizing and re-organizing my pictures. And then screwing them up and organizing them again.

That's all for now. I'm sure I'll come up with more later.

Old Blog - 10.17.2005

Monday, October 17, 2005 

My Sister
Current mood:  touched 
Category: Life

So check out this e-mail I just got from my sister the writer.  I received this less than an hour after I sent her a whiny e-mail about how lame my life is right now. Ohhh I heart her.

 

Maybe it's good that Mom and Dad didn't have the third.  Imagine 
spending 
your life as the middle-child.

Well, the good news is that you're moving to New (Jersey) York in 
roughly 
two months.  Just say two, even if it's three.  Holidays are subtracted 
because you get to see more friends.

The bad news is that you'll need to get used to being broke because 
it's 
going to be that way for a very long time.  Trust me.  I've been broke 
for 
three years.

More good news is that I'm coming in barely over a month.  We have a 
date on 
Tuesday night (the Tuesday I arrive) after Mom and Dad go to bed.

More good news is that Mom and Dad will miss you so much after you 
leave, 
they'll only remember how fun and perfect you really are.  Then, Joey 
will 
be the screw-up.

The bad news is you'll probably have far worse bosses than Page.  The 
good 
news is, you'll probably never have to drive again for a cell phone.

The good news is your sister lives in Greenwich Village, so you have a 
place 
to crash there. The bad news is, KITTY will steal your thong again.

The good news is that you're moving in with a wonderful friend.  The 
bad 
news is that car insurance in New Jersey is stupid expensive.

Good news: Meredith has her degree and is pursuing something that very 
few 
people will ever have the chance to do.

Bad news: There will always be bad news.  But your good news is so much 
better than all of that.

There never are in-betweens for people like you and I.  We live 
INTERESTING 
lives.  People who live in-between lives rent cars to people for a 
living.

I love you.

C